SEX ... Morality ... How It's Changed
If you haven't figured it out by now, there isn't any topic I'm afraid to discuss or comment on. This however, is a bit more tricky because this is a blog, not a book. Thanks Jennifer from L.A. for requesting this one. It was certainly a challenge. I will start with this. It is NOT my intent to judge or piss anyone off. Sex, I get it. I like it to, and probably more than most. But that's not the point. These are simple observations, as well as factually based statements, evidence and data. Buckle up because the ride is about to start.
Sex as it relates to morality, and how it' changed. This isn't the 60's and 70's anymore. There are no musicals titled "Hair", and no Volkswagen minibuses. I believe most will agree that we live in a more sexually liberated and open society as compared to years ago. Personally, I'm fine with that. What I'm not fine with is, WHERE DO WE DRAW THE LINE IN THE SAND? When does it affect others, and those that should not be exposed to it, particularly, children. Adults are old enough to make the choice. YET. This is a social media world. The world of the internet. A world where anything goes. And go it does. The sex toy business alone is worth 15 billion dollars a year. Give me 15 billion dollars and I'll be your toy for a year. It's impossible to know what the total of all things that relate to sex combined is worth each year. But I am willing to bet we can pay off the national debt and have plenty of change let over. A business. Not a state of morality. Personally or spiritually. For example, do people really need to show their nude bodies in their social media posts, or the sex acts you're performing? Do you really require the validation from others that you do these things, or have a nice body? News feeds that children can access? I get it. It's your personal preference, and you own it until it has a adverse affect on others. Frankly, it doesn't bother me from a personal aspect, but it does infuriate me when I go into a school to speak, and kids are watching it on their cell phones.
When that occurs, it now become an issue of morality, values, and basic principals of right and wrong. There are adult clubs all over the country that will pay you do it on stage. On a stage where adults, who we will assume have the wisdom to make their own choices. Like it or not, this is the world we live in today. Where society has evolved to. However, with that said, this is where I totally believe that line in the sand is crossed. Even with parental controls, they only go so far. If someone wants to get naked and display their bodies or sexual acts, than subscribe to a private and secure site that supports that. We talk about gun control, and other controls. Do you realize that sex related crimes or the acts involved in those crimes result in death that exceed the number of people killed by guns exponentially? Yes sex, you remember that. That act that we do to bring us both emotional and physical pleasure. That act that people are now killed over because a some married guy can;t keep it is his pants, or some married women can keep her legs closed. Look, it you can;t handle the truth, there's no point in reading on. As I always say, you can mask it, hide it, or paint any picture you want of it, but in the end, THE TRUTH IS ALWAYS THE TRUTH. I'm not infringing on anyone's rights here, I am saying, keep that shit to yourself.
I will say this again. As a society, we are not only responsible to ourselves, but also to others. Those that are affected by this can, and have experienced, adverse reactions as a result, which many can be long term. People, do you not believer that there aren't stalkers out there with just simple computer software can find where you are? Ahhhh .... if that happens it's not really fun anymore is it? Let's get some facts out of the way. Children become curious starting between the ages of 6 - 10 years old. As their hormones become more active, they become more interested. That's the quick and easy medical explanation. Therefore, what they see on TV, in the movies, at home, or on social media will rapidly suck them in. In some cases, this can be dangerous if someone has a specific type of mental disorder. At certain ages, children will begin to experiment with themselves. More so in boys. They should not be scolded for it, rather, insist they go in their room and be in a private place. That is part of normal development. You eat a food, it tastes good, so you eat it again. Now take that same child, and expose him or her, to what is openly displayed on social media, and you now have one confused and curious kid on your hand. What they see in their eyes, now becomes accepted behavior in their brain. One they will explore with the opposite sex much earlier in age which can cause emotional trauma to another.
After over 30 years in the public health system, I cannot, and refuse to sit in a movie theater where a scene depicting a violent rape is depicted. That is not awareness, that is selling tickets. I will get up and leave. Why? Because I have seen it's effects up front and personal in the real world ranging from children to adults. IT's DEVASTATING. I am a full supporter and quite active in the area of battered and abused women. If you want a taste of reality, spend a day with me on an ambulance in the inner city. Reality is nothing like what you see in the movies, or read in a book. We're not talking about passionate love scenes here. We are talking about violent crimes. Do you want to talk reality with me, let's do it. On more than one occasion I have had to transport the body of an abducted female that is deceased after being found in the woods, or in her car, after being beaten and raped by multiple assailants. Witness the look on a husbands or families face when they are told. See a counselor talking to a child that witnessed it. That my friends is REALITY. So if you're wondering why I won't tolerate it on a movie screen, there you have it. Where does it begin? Like everything else, it begins by what we are exposed to. It's both physical and emotional trauma.
Before birth control was introduced to younger girls and boys, the rate of pregnancy in young girls was rapidly rising. This means the degree of sexual activity at a young age was also rising. The acceptance and education on prevention of pregnancy has helped to decrease that rate dramatically. Let's face it. It's going to happen, so why not educate and prevent. However, is that the lesson we want to teach our children? It's okay to have sex at 13, 14 or 15 as long as your on the pill, or the boy wears a condom? The price to pay for this has been an alarming increase in the rate of sexually transmitted disease's in our young adults. Why wear a condom if the girl is on the pill. To some degree the following saying is true. Every time you have sex with someone, you're having sex with every other person they have had sex with before you. Not literally of course, but medically, yes. So we fixed one problem just to replace it with another. One that can be life threatening. This stems from many places. SOME parents taking their children with them to see a movie they've wanted to see where some of the content is quite revealing, and certainly not appropriate for the age of the child. PAY A BABYSITTER. And don't even try to convince me that the movie theater monitors the age of the children going in with their parents. When I worked overnights, I came in contact with ladies of the night that were 15 years old, and when dressed and made up, anyone would swear they were over 21.
Commercials where due to the nature of the product, they are displayed in a more sexually tainted manner that should have been aired later at night. After prime time, when the little ones are supposed to be sleeping. Do we need to have the gorgeous model with a knock down drop dead gorgeous body model underwear such as panties and bra's in a commercial at 7 pm? Than the ridiculous logic starts to come from someone who doesn't have a brain in their head. "Well it's no different than seeing a girl on the beach in a bathing suit." Like hell it is. Let's not even get into the discussion on bathing suits. Again, I have no issue with what type of bathing suit a woman wants to wear. Many like the thong bottom suits. Your choice, but you might as well wear nothing since all of their bottom is exposed anyway. Just regulate the beaches where that type of garment can be worn. I have always suggested to have a children's portion section on a beach. A section where children are not exposed to that. Like most things in our society, it's not what we do that's the problem, it's how we do it. How about some of the day time and night time TV shows. Don't BS me, you know the type I'm talking about. They do everything short of making love on camera. During the day, what about a snow day? Guess who's home?
Technology. Now we give our young people cell phones at ridiculously young ages so we don't have to watch them, we can simply call them and tell them to come back. The only positive thing to that is if someone was smart enough to turn the GPS on, and the person who just abducted them didn't throw the phone away. There are many ways to access the internet on a cell phone. Kids know the technology better than the adults. So there you go, porn, nudity, sex and a wealth of information and photos they can see just by doing a search. So I ask again. Where do we draw the line? Sex, as it is meant to be in of itself, does not cause bad morals any more than a gun will get off the table and fire itself. It's what is done with that stimuli that causes the problem. The saying, "There is a time and place for everything" is absolutely true. Honestly, I don't understand why social media even allows that content. One day, and trust me that day will come, a parent will sue, and probably win, if their child commits a crime where it was determined and proven that it was a direct result of what was seen on social media. "The dark web." Remember my earlier comment? We not only have a responsibility to ourselves, but also to others. So you might be thinking, this guy is against sex. ABSOLUTELY not. That is the farthest thing from the truth. However, for me, it's respected and PRIVATE. Private between two people, not for the world to watch, not for me to brag about and tell my friends, and certainly not for me to put on Social media. I don't need that type of validation to prove I'm a man.
To answer the question does sex have an effect on morality. Unfortunately the answer to that question is yes, and a huge impact at that. Whats the answer? That's where the problem really sits, because like most answers, people do not face reality, therefore, it never gets fixed. Ignore it and it will go away. It doesn't. Ignore it and it will get worse. The number of rape cases goes up each year, the number of sexual abuse cases goes up each year, as well as all other cases where different sex crimes apply. High school and college suicide rates go up each year, cases of sexually transmitted diseases go up each year. Jesus, you don't even know who you could shake hands with anymore. It's a given that one day every bird will leave it's nest. The exposure to life will be there, however, it's how we prepare our youth for the real world that will make the difference in their understanding and survival. So yes, sex is DISPLAYED far to openly in many areas that are to easy for those who shouldn't be exposed to it, therefore, it will lead to sexual moral issues in our society. It will question values, and spirituality. Today, for women just saying no doesn't work anymore. Date rape drugs are even in higher use each year. You can't say no when you can't speak. You may or may not agree with many of the things I have discussed here. You don't have to because I will respect your opinion as I hope you will respect mine. But the one thing that can never be disputed are the FACTS. The truth is always the truth. So here we are, welcome to 2018.
I ask you, IS THAT WHERE YOU WANT OUR SOCIETY TO BE, BECAUSE ONE DAY, THOSE PICTURES COULD BE OF OF YOUR SON OR DAUGHTER? .... CJR