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"The Reality Of Dating"

The game of dating. Isn't it fun and interesting. So many say that dating has changed. Has it? Isn't the principal still the same? You see someone, you like them, you ask them out. Simple right? Well .... not so much.

Dating is a new world in today's society. Besides being single and involved with dating myself, I have done a great deal of research on this. Dating used to be you met someone at a wedding, a party, or when you were out. You had the opportunity to introduce yourself, or be introduced. If they interested you, you talked for awhile. If you felt a connection you explored the possibility of getting together. If it were mutual, you received a phone number and went from there. Although that still occurs, we now add social media and dating sites into the mix, and now we really have a shit show on our hands.

I really get a charge out of dating sites. If you ever read the profiles it's like everyone is into the same thing. Travel, romance, exercise, golf, tennis, hiking, etc. When do they have time to work? Everyone is independent, financially secure and it looking for the same. Courtesy? What's that. According to my research, the following are the top five complaints people have voiced about dating sites:

1. Fake profiles. These are scammers, stalkers, or God knows what else.

2. People do not post recent photos. SURPRISE! When you meet, that beautiful woman or handsome man looks nothing like their picture. Who knew?

3. People do not reply. Many state they reach out with an email, and the person does not even acknowledge them for writing with a reply. It has been determined that most would like a reply. Even if it is a no. So what happened to that compassionate, caring, person? They have everything except courtesy.

4. PEOPLE LIE. The general impression is those that use dating sites either can;t get a date anywhere else, have many issues, (baggage).

5. It could be a long process that over time gets costly.

Most people who use dating sites do not like long extended emails. They would rather get to a phone call, and than a meeting. In today's society women are much more cautious than men, and they need to be. However, with that said, what do they do when they are out? Don;t they talk to people? Due to the cost of going out, many people have turned to online dating. You could almost buy a bottle of wine after buying two glasses at a bar. The reality is, dating, or searching for a relationship can be expensive. The sad part is, there is no easy fix. A person needs to choose a plan, or a combination of plans, stick with it, and be patient. Patience is not abundant in today's society. Everyone wants it yesterday. This is the main reason for failed relationships. My book "Making Partnership Choices" explores every aspect of this and more.

FUN FACTS: Dating Experiences. Has any of this happened to you on a first date?

  • The date is going so bad you have someone call you so you can leave.

  • You meet someone for your first date. You are so nervous you forget their name.

  • When your server says to you in front of your date, "Nice to see you again this week."

  • When you are short on money and you order a salad and one drink. Your date orders a steak and drinks like a fish.

  • When you new date invites you over for a cooked meal and the first bite of food is so bad, it makes you want to vomit, as she is telling you how she has been complimented on being an excellent cook.

  • When your date makes a comment on their Facebook page about you and accidentally tags you.

  • When you have your first kiss and your foreheads bump. Ouch!

  • When you meet someone you really like and are looking forward to a great relationship and sex. As you discuss families, you find out you are distant cousins.

  • You just had a new crown put on a front tooth, and it comes off at dinner.

These are just a few funny things. Why don't you leave comment below and share a funny experience.

Summary: What is the reality of dating? Simply put:

1. It is a combination of knowing your limitations and expectations, meaning what you are willing to accept or not accept, and being able to move on.

2. Knowing what you are getting into and the issues that will be associated with it so you do not get frustrated.

3. Be patient. Do not rush into anything.

4. Be yourself and truthful. The truth always comes out.

5. No matter what platform you use, live, online, or otherwise, be yourself. You can't put an act on forever. If something isn't right for you. MOVE ON.

In Closing: What used to be a simple concept still is. However, people as they most often times do, make it far more complicated then it needs to be. If you state to much, you're a player. If you don;t date enough, something is wrong with you. Can you ever win? Yes you can, and people do. It just takes time and patience. Two simple concepts.

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Thank you .... CJR

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