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So, You Say I'm Different? - Being different is not wrong. It's what you do that makes you wrong.



INTRODUCTION:


Greetings. I hope you are all enjoying a Happy and Safe Memorial Day weekend.

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Terrance from North Carolina wrote me, stating that people always tell him he's different, and asked me to discuss this topic. Before I begin, allow me to make something perfectly clear. There are people in the world that break the law. This article DOES NOT apply to the criminal element. In addition, some people are born with various physical, emotional, or mental disorders. This post also DOES NOT APPLY to them.


They are different and should always be treated equally by society or law enforcement. This we why we call ourselves civilized human beings. At times, I wonder how much of that is debatable. However, this article is about the everyday person that goes through life attempting to find happiness for themselves but is faced with the adversity of society. The adversity we all know at times can exist within people towards others.


ADVERSITY:


Adversity is defined as difficulties or misfortunes. Some may be coincidental, and others may be deliberate. Sometimes, things in life don't come together like we thought or planned. This is common, and we all have faced this form of adversity at some point along our journey in life. The phrase, "being at the right place at the right time," is often times accurate. Others might say, "The stars were in alignment." Call it luck, or whatever you wish, things worked out. Some people are luckier than others when it refers to this phenomenon.


Phrases such as "they step in crap and come out smelling like roses" or "everything they touch turns into gold." We have all used them. Is it luck or planning? No one knows. All we know is that this always seems to be true for some. For the remainder of us, we are stuck with adversity. Much of which is caused by people.


However, you say you are different. In what way? Why am I asking? Because everyone is different. We all have our own opinions, likes, and dislikes—as well as different views or ways of seeing things.

Most of all, we all feel we are right. Is there a right or wrong? Many people are more diverse than others. There are many reasons for this.


  • Cultures

  • Religious beliefs

  • Upbringing

  • Living environment

  • Vocation'Education, or lack of.

  • Experiences

  • Conditioning

  • and more

These are just a few things that make people different. Then there are medical reasons. Many are born with different chemical balances. These might be the ones that make us heterosexual, bi-sexual, gay, or other types of social preferences. Who is to say who is right or wrong? I do not believe there is a right or wrong. Remember, we are NOT talking about what is considered legal or illegal in the eyes of the law and society. We are talking about people being who they are. In addition, others should be accepted as to who they are as individuals, providing they are NOT causing harm to others or forcing their opinions on others. Everyone has the right to live their life as they choose.


Throughout various stages in our life, we do not understand the true meaning of diversity. We see someone as different. Different than us and our friends. Therefore, we assume something is wrong with them. Society tends to alienate them and treat them differently than we treat others. In our earlier stages of mental development, and even in the case of some older adults, this leads to various forms of bullying. Is that right? Just because someone wears different clothes, talks differently, has an accent, or a different skin color skin, or practices their faith differently? BY NO MEANS IS THIS RIGHT. Therefore, being different is NOT wrong. What is wrong is what we do because of who and what we are that could be wrong.


Regardless of the individual you are, breaking the law and/or causing harm to others is NEVER right. The political view is a big culprit. Many families and friends do not speak to one another because of their political views. How ridiculous is that? At times in life, you have to agree to disagree and move on.

I love this saying. "OPINIONS ARE LIKE REAENDS> EVERYONE HAS ONE." However, your opinion is not the only one on the block and does NOT make you right. However, it can make you wrong. Why is that? The reason is that opinions oftentimes make us judgemental. Let me ask you a question. Who died and left you boss to pass judgment on others?


The key to diversity is understanding and accepting that people are different. No two are the same. Of course, people may have similar qualities, thoughts, and views, which are essential in such things as relationships. However, no two people are exactly alike.


Think about that. If every person in the world thinks they are right and everyone else is wrong, what type of problems do you think we would have? Many many of the social issues we are now faced with in society?


SOCIALITY:


Sociality is the ability to be socially interactive or a person's degree of sociability. Due to the human condition, there are different degrees of how social someone is. Some require more trust than others. Some will just put themselves out there. Others will worry about what others think, while others may not care.


Again, as I stated many times, one is no more correct than the other. It is just people living their individual lives. Lives they should NOT be judged for. Especially against your standards, because who is to say your standards are the golden rule?


Some things in life cannot be taught because other factors govern them. For example, you cannot teach someone to be a hero. You can teach them what a hero is considered to be, but you can't teach them or turn them into heroes. Primarily because the sympathetic or parasympathetic nervous system primarily governs those instincts. As a quick review, the sympathetic system controls “fight-or-flight” responses. In other words, this system prepares the body for strenuous physical activity. The events that we would expect to occur within the body to allow this to happen do, in fact, occur. The parasympathetic system regulates “rest and digest” functions.


As with all rules, there are exceptions. One might be someone less likely to be a hero and jump into battle to help others may do so when their family is directly threatened. This emotional response overtakes their own nervous system. Oh, and by the way. There is no line to stand in when you are being conceived for you to choose which nervous system will control your primary response. This is an innate function. Meaning it is an inborn natural response. It is hardwired from birth into your DNA.


On the other hand, sociality, or an individual's degree of being sociable, comes from different levels of individual security within themselves. This can be learned and changed. Once we determine where we are not confident in ourselves, we can work on those areas and eventually, with some help and practice, become as sociable as we choose to be.


SO, YOU SAY I'M DIFFERENT?


We are all different. Therefore, you may be different than others in a different way. In high school, especially in high school, everyone wants to be with the popular crowd. Well, what is the popular crowd? Also, who is to say that others are not the popular crowd? They are but in their own way. A way that is different than others. Times change, and generations change. People, in general, at any stage of their life, want to be socially accepted. However, It is my opinion this social acceptance is most predominant in our high school years.


Teenagers follow trends. Trends such as clothing, etc. When I was in high school, I followed no rules. I played sports. Therefore, someone might call me a jock. I was also in a high school fraternity; some might say I was a troublemaker. I also liked to be intellectually challenged and belonged to different clubs. Therefore, some might say I was a nerd. So I was a joke, a troublemaker, and a nerd all at the same time. WHO CARES?


If you are going to live your life based on the approval of others, you will be living a life dedicated to you by others. So, if you say you are different, be proud of it because you have joined the ranks of the largest club in the world. You are independent. You are an independent thinker. Others will not control you. That, my friends, is the popular crowd. Enjoy being a proud member.


The second part of the title, "It's what you do that makes you wrong," is basic. If you believe in something so strongly that you protest or take a stand against it, but do it right and peacefully. DO NOT CAUSE HARM TO OTHERS. That is what makes your being different wrong. No one has the right, regardless of their opinion, to cause bodily harm or property damage under the auspices of being different.


IN CLOSING:


Being different is acceptable; in today's society, being different is much more socially accepted than in decades past, as with everything in life. They must be FAIR and EQUAL to all because everyone shares the same rights. That is where the problem comes in. Because who determines what are FAIR and Equal? Oh yes, people do. No one should. If everyone is treated fairly and equally at every level, there would be no need for anyone to try to figure out what is FAIR and Equal. Why should fairness and equality be limited to a perfect world? The world will never be perfect. Therefore, does that mean we will never realize fairness and equality for all? I certainly hope not.


We will not always agree. We will always have different viewpoints. However, everything in life boils down to one basic phrase—an important phrase, especially in legal litigation.


"A MEETING OF THE MINDS"


Yes, there is a fancy definition of that phrase. Simply put, it's COMPROMISE—a place where both people may still not agree but can live comfortably with the decision or outcome. Therefore, live your life. Don't worry about how everyone else lives; never judge others for their choices. Lastly, remember that this entire post relates to everyday people. Not those who break the law, criminals, or those with emotional or mental disorders.


Be safe, stay well, and focus on being happy. And remember to always:


Live with an open mind,

Live with an open heart,

Live your best life.


Best Regards,


Caesar Rondina


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